Not nice at all

I think aliens have taken my child and replaced him with a different little boy.

Here are the reasons I believe this to be true:

Scary stuff: Biscuit told Jeff this evening, "Dad, there's a shark and a zombie."

"Oh, yeah?" Jeff said. "What's a zombie?"

"Um, it's a, it's a, it's a, um, it's a man," Biscuit said.

Zombie?!? Who told him about zombies?

Mean, mean, mean: Jeff went into our bedroom to get Biscuit for his bath. He was watching an episode of a show he likes. Jeff had told him he could watch the show, but he didn't realize it was a 1-hour show instead of a half-hour show, and bathtime was drawing nigh.

"Biscuit, let's get your bath,"Jeff said to him.

"But I'm still watching this show," Biscuit said.

"Come on," Jeff said. "We need to go now. And besides, you've seen this one already."

And do you know what Biscuit said? "Go away. I want to watch this."

He's not gonna take it anymore: Last night, I was lying on my size of mine and Jeff's king-size bed, and Jeff was lying on the other side. We both had our backs toward the middle of the bed, and we were both reading. And Biscuit was in the middle of the bed watching his nightly TV episode.

Suddenly, Biscuit started to cry.

"What's wrong?" I asked him.

"Um, I don't have a place to lay down," Biscuit wailed.

"You've got the whole middle of the bed," I said to him.

"No, Mom. That's not my spot. I don't have a spot," Biscuit said.

We went back and forth a few times, then I guess Biscuit was done talking about it.

He slide off the end of our bed and walked to the bedroom door.

He looked back and Jeff and me, threw his hand in the air and said, "I'm outta here!"

It seems like I've written so many bad things about Biscuit lately. He's definitely going through some stuff. He wants his independence, but there are still so many things he can't do on his own. He's testing his boundaries to see how much Jeff and I will take before we push back. He's a smart kid, and he puts things together that are beyond his years. But his emotional maturity isn't quite as far along.

These are the times that try Mamas' souls.